My doubts are really getting to me right now. Like my paranoia and self conscience and stuff. And I hate it because its always about my girlfriend and it sucks because I am afraid they are going to drive her away. I am so needy, I just always need to feel her. Skin on skin. Snuggles. Kisses. Hold her hand.
But sometimes she acts like I am just a piece of meat to her and doesn’t want to touch me. I don’t know. It might not be true, but it just sucks feeling like this.
I am always afraid that since we are both so completely different most of the time, it will get in the way. Like I am comfortable snuggling all day long. I absolutely love snuggling and laying around watching movies. But she only likes to snuggle when we go to sleep. I like that too, but that is the only time she likes it.
Might be because when I grew, I never got that. I didn’t get hugs or snuggles or anything physical contact. And I am afraid that my neediness sometimes will drive her away. I am just afraid that my whole being will drive her away in general.
And when I try to talk to her about stuff, it just because a fight or me hurting her feelings. I love her, I don’t want to hurt her at all. I just want to talk to her.
I don’t know anymore.